Hair Today, Gone Today

Snakes!

Not the Definitive version

Areas for improvement,folds on jeans and feet!

Might get a haircut too! (Didn't manage today, Tuesday!)

Also maybe my belly is not quite as large...

The Great Procrastinator

I have discovered my power.

I am able to sit around all day thinking about what I could and should do.

But do I do? No, I surf the Internet instead of improving my CAD skills.

Is it a lack of motivation? Very possibly.

Is it a lack of excitement? Absolutely.

Is it a lack of interest? Definitely.

Hmmm.

I am the Mopeinator.

(I may have to draw The Mopeinator)

My wound from my operation is healing and the bruising has gone from purple to being lemon coloured.

Darwinism, Evolution...

In the past year those around me have moved up grades at work and a few have bought their own homes.

Friends are soon to be parents.

My brother got engaged.

Me, I'm turning into a machine. Artificial add-ons to keep me going.

It's been a frustrating year just watching it all go past and not partaking in life nor evolving myself or moving up a grade at work nor looking for somewhere to live so that I too can bitch and moan about my mortgage.

Yes, I'm in a philosophically bitchy mood today if there can be such a state. I have decided I don't like one person because they always harp on about their frickin' mortgage and then when they misheard that my brother was marrying his girlfriend sounded so shocked and surprised that I had a girlfriend, the implication being I couldn't find a girlfriend. God, I hate that dumb broad, she needs to listen properly first! And if you can't afford your mortgage then you shouldn't have bought it then, you dumb, selfish, insensitive cow!

Just venting! Still here?

So what's it all about?

I'm like a dinosaur who didn't evolve with the rest...get the violins out for the FeelingBitterandBluesauraus.

Wait a minute the dinosaurs didn't evolve...arghhh! So is it better to be a cockroach?!

I'll be fine after lunch...that's the other thing about me, I'm like a dog or a baby, I get irritable when I'm hungry!

Then I went back again...

Shortly after the previous post about 2 hours to be more precise the bruising had got worse and so it was back in the car to return to the hospital.

There I was given a big pressure dressing that used up 2 rolls of tape! That was followed by a couple of painkillers and then being shown to a bed.

The short explanation is that due to my blood thinning drugs I am going to bruise more easily and o get me prepared for the operation last Tuesday I was taken off my blood thinning drugs.

Once the operation was completed then I need to be placed back on the blood thinning drugs and my blood taken till it is back to the level it was before.

The bleedout across my chest (under the skin) is quite spectaculary large but not painful. It's like a giant tattoo and the colour of grapes.

The new incision is 2.5" or 6.35cm into which the ICD was placed.

So I am back again from the hospital where time moves in a weird vacuum and the minutes move painfully slowly in the stillness of the hospital.

Fingers crossed I won't be there as an Inpatient for a long time although I did quite like my adjustable electric bed and some of the nurses!

Bing, bing, bing

So after a quick stay at my Chelsea Residence I return home with the addition of an ICD and a big bruise.

Essentially arrive on Tuesday get in bed meet some staff, told procedure may have to wait. go out to dinner and return to hospital.

Wednesday get woken by doctor at 830 am, told procedure will happen later on probably after lunchtime. 1030 return to room after a wander to find porter waiting to take me down to Lab, so get dressed into sexy hospital gown, the one where you can see whoever's wearing said robe's bottom. Heavily sedated reawake on ward eat lunch feel tired.

Thursday heavily bruised but expected to go home. Get X-Ray and pacing tests done then wait for take home meds to arrive.
Go home with big bruise and feeling tired.

I came, I saw, I went home

Well, I did get out of the house more often than not and realised that the world is alright and much better in a way than the negative void that I currently occupy that goes under the codename 'home'.

Monday you all know about please see below.

Tuesday I had a wander around St Albans surprised at the diversity of architecture and churches. No pictures because I noticed all these details had I had the camera with me no doubt I wouldn't have noticed.

Wednesday, rested waited for Champions League Qualifying match on the televison in the evening that Liverpool won just. The new signings looked promising but I think Mr Benitez hasn't quite worked out how to use them all effectively yet. Although I hope Jermaine Pennant tears Chelsea up on Sunday especially since they Chelsea do not have strength at left back.

Thursday, stewed in my own juices again and went to inform my GP/General Practioner/Doctor of my upcoming hospital visit which was the first he had heard of it. I guess the psychic messages from the hospital hadn't been received yet. Iam very tempted to have a seriouis verbal with the hospital on Tuesday or is it like complaining in a restaurant in that you have to be wary of how and when you complain in case they do something to you or your food out of spite!?

Friday I was really busy, I ventured into London for the first time in a month and a good lunch and natter with one of blog visitors. We have a kind of lunch club going on whenever I'm in the general area. Yesterday was a Polish restaurant where we enjoyed a hearty platter of food. Then I went across the road and saw images of Che Guevara and got lost in the Victoria and Albert Museum. From there it was onto Leicester Square to buy Mogwai's album 'Mr. Beast' and to watch Jack Black in 'Nacho Libre'. Then I was hungry again! So now it was Vietnamese noodle time in Chinatown.

There's still more then I met my friend Irish T at the Southbank had a chat then went home after a buy day. I must be getting healthier because I found myself on the verge of losing it with all the dawdling tourists in the stations blocking the exits.

It's now almost three years since I stopped smoking I have to fight the urge not to go up to girls and tell them:

'When I saw you from a distance I thought you were an 8 or maybe even a 9 but then I came closer and saw you smoked and now you're a 3'

Of course I would never do that but I think it.

Saturday feeling grumpy but then thats normal for a Saturday because I hate Saturdays unless its football season then i look forward to the highlights programme in the evening. Season starts next week thank god!

However, I am quite looking forward to losing this freedom of general aimlessness that I have been living for the past year. I would like very much to return to work and long hours so that I have some routine and can see faces from the past and share laughs and work as part of a team and complain about how I have no free time! ;)

Not sure about this hobby

Well, I picked another location, read up on the tide charts, got in the car and drove off to the coast again. Yes, another day out at a ghost town trying to remains of long gone creatures from the deep.

And no I didn't find any teeth yet again as I wandered back and forth along the 'beach' at low tide. This is not turning out to be the greatest hobby in the world. I'm not expecting to be an expert at it straight away but it does seem like looking for a needle in a haystack.

I think what I need is an army of small children who are closer to the ground and therefore more likely to spot something.

There were lots of clumps of mussels, the odd oyster shell and bits of crabs and lots of new seashells but as to fossil teeth I didn't find any of those.

On the plus side it does get me out of the house.

Live it!

I need to do more instead of reading or watching others' exploits in the things I'd like to do.

Instead of trying to live and breathe and experience things I merely observe and live vicariously.

Just what is holding me back why can't I be all that I can be (the Marines would never have me).

What am i afraid of?

Rejection? Failure?

All the slogans I need to take note...'Just do it', 'Live life to the Max', 'Be all that you can be'.

I have become a shrinking violet, a human hermit crab...

Why do I sit here?

Why do I sit here alone on a Saturday night?

Because I'm too tired to go anywhere (2105)

0250h - Questions that I ask myself.

These are some of the things keeeping me awake and if you feel like it dear readers I'd love to hear your answers to the questions as they relate to you and your lives.


1) What is the most important thing in life?

2) What would make me happy?

3) What is happy?

4) Where do I really want to be?

5) What do I really want to do?

6) Why haven't I made more of my life?

7) How do I improve my situation?


There's a whole lot more that center on my affairs of the heart and mechanics of it, if only it were as simple as a machine but we'll save those for another am wide awake club day...

Oh and thank you.

0317h What am I doing?! Just go to F***in bed!

'Miami Vice'

I haven't put my thoughts on a movie here for a while. I saw the two big summer movies 'Pirates of the Caribbean 2' which was way too long and 'Superman Returns'. I enjoyed the latter and was impressed with Brandon Routh as Superman but not with Kate Bosworth as a rather limp Lois Lane. My biggest problem with the film was that it presupposes that the audience is well aware of the history of the films that came before. I'm not so sure it takes into consideration new viewers who might not have seen a Superman film before in their lives.

BUT I'm not here to talk about 'Superman Returns', no instead I want to talk about 'Miami Vice' directed by Michael Mann. There aren't many films where I go because of the director. In fact there aren't that many directors who are well known enough that they precede their films. There's Scorsese and Spielberg but how many people know who directed 'Pirates of the Caribbean 2' without looking it up?

A little like "Superman Returns' presupposed that the audience would know about the characters from its previous incarnations 'Miami Vice' introduces to Crockett and Tubbs. Yep, those guys again, some of you might remember the TV show...

What I felt was lacking here was Mann's meticulous storytelling this time round any sort of backstory or even procedural practise of grounding Crockett and Tubbs as members of a Police force are bypassed as we are thrown straight into the action. You don't actually grow to care particulary for either Tubbs or Crockett because you never really find out what motivates them. In 'Heat' De Niro plays the leader of a crew that pulls of heists, they're criminals! But down to the writing and DeNiro himself you actually give a damn about him.

Colin Farrell and Jamie Foxx are good as the duo and the supporting performances are good although Gong Li was a little hard to understand at times. The experiments in HD cinematography continue here that started with 'Collateral' and there are some beaytifully photgraphed scenes. Gunfire also has a very distinct sound in a Micahel Mann film and this is the case again here.

I think we as an audience should also have been treated to some of the glamour and bling of Miami in a tourist way to show the reasons for the escalation of drugs and the need for the lavish lifestyles.

There is also alot of facial hair going on in the film! Full beards, taches, goatess...

I read one review unfortunately I forgot where that pointed out Michael Mann's films are always about very serious men doing very serious jobs with little humour. I'd have to agree, I'm not sure why exactly the film doesn't quite work but I've given a couple of reasons above. Feel free to disagree or point out things if you do see it.

'Miami Vice' it all washes over you but pardon the expression doesn't truly grab you by the balls. It's almost like Mann is painting by numbers, its a good movie but not a great movie.

Do the Shuffle

Haven't posted one of these for a while nearly all actually come from an OST except for 1,5,9,10

1) My Baby Just Cares For Me - Nina Simone
2) Jailhouse Rock - Old Boy OST
3) Sorrow - Hans Zimmer & Lisa Gerrard/ Gladiator OST
4)The Plans - David Holmes/ Ocean's Eleven OST
5 Miles Runs The Voodoo Down - Miles Davis
6) Subtle Body - Fila Braziliiia
7) The Projects - Handsome Boy Modelling School/Ocean's Eleven OST
8) Terapia Interrotta - Francesco Forni
9) O Green World - Gorillaz
10) Bad Dreams Interlude - Lyrics Born

Bonus Track: Shadow on the Sun - Audioslave